Thursday, 26 March 2015
Gappy Gertie (finally!)
Firstly, my apologies to anyone viewing this rather gruesome post over breakfast. This front tooth has been waggling about for weeks, I've been desperate to get my hands on it and during tea tonight it finally made its gory departure. I do not remember so much blood when I lost my teeth. And that got me thinking that from now on, Matilda will remember most of her childhood. No longer will she be cocooned merely in my fuzzy mother's memories, she'll have her own pretty clear memories. I find that quite odd, though I'm not sure why. Maybe I'm just worried because now I can't afford to make so many parenting mistakes. Anything I get wrong from here on in will be stored away in her memory and may or may not come back to haunt me (or worse, her) later. Or maybe it's because the recollection of your own memories marks the start of consciously building your own personality, of becoming a 'proper' person apart from your parents. Now as you know, I am all for independence but part of me finds the prospect slightly scary. I find my own consciousness tricky to negotiate, will I be able to keep up with the ever-changing consciousness of my child?
Gosh, all that reflection from the loss of a tooth. It's like Proust and the madeleine all over again.*
*Ridiculous (and inaccurate) posturing, you know I have never read Proust.